Writing Task 1 exercise 1: Gold Sales in Dubai 2002

Example:
Brand 6:
The given diagram illustrates the changes of gold sales during 2002. Overall, the gold sales remained relatively unchanged in 2002.
In the first month of 2002, gold sales stood at 200 million of dirhams and rose dramatically to 350 million in March. However, it experienced a plunge to around 110 million after four months before fluctuating around 150 and 200 million. In final quarter of the years, the figures stay stable around 130 million and return 190 million in December.
Brand 8 improvement:
Write a Strong Overview (Most Important)
✅ Band 8 overview
Overall, gold sales rose sharply to a peak in March before declining steadily until July, after which the figures fluctuated for the rest of the year.
Why this is better:
- Mentions peak
- Mentions lowest period
- Mentions fluctuation
Examiners care a lot about this sentence.
Group Information (Instead of Month by Month)
Band 6 writers describe every month.
Band 8 writers group trends.
Example grouping:
Period 1: Jan → Mar (increase)
Period 2: Mar → Jul (decline)
Period 3: Aug → Dec (fluctuation)
Example:
From January to March, sales rose sharply, peaking at 350 million dirhams. However, between March and July the figure declined steadily, reaching a low of about 120 million. During the remaining months, sales fluctuated, ending the year at approximately 190 million.
Avoid Repeating Words
You repeated gold sales many times.
Band 8 variation:
Instead of repeating:
- gold sales
- gold sales
- gold sales
Use:
- sales
- the figure
- the amount
- the total
Final band 8 example:
The line graph illustrates gold sales in Dubai in 2002, measured in millions of dirhams.
Overall, sales rose sharply to a peak in March before declining steadily until July, after fluctuating during the remainder of the year.
In January, sales stood at 200 million dirhams and rose slightly to around 220 million in February. They then surged to a peak of approximately 350 million in March. However, the figure fell sharply in the following months, dropping to about 250 million in April and 200 million in May, before reaching a low of around 120 million in July.
In the remaining months, sales fluctuated considerably. They recovered to just above 200 million in August, before falling again to roughly 120 million in September. After that, sales increased gradually, ending the year at around 190 million in December.